We all know I love weddings. I love everything about them. I love planning them and seeing them come to life. I love the colors, the dresses, the decorations. Everything.
It has been easy for me to get caught up in the pictures, the reception, the planning, the "tinsel" and possible forget what is most important. The actual marriage - the covenant - the temple - Taylor. Luckily for me my sweet loving fiance has his head on straight and kindly reminds me that the only time that really matters on May 4th is 10:30am, when we will be sealed for eternity.
Originally I had planned to do the spiritual side of the wedding on a different day than the reception/dinner/luncheon (aka high stress planning activities) so that it would be separate, so I could focus on each aspect individually rather than them all in one packed day. But through discussion with family we decided it was best for our many out of town guests to have all the events together on the same day. This is a challenge for me. A lesson in understanding, patience, "going with the flow," and most importantly in seeing what is important about my wedding day.
Though I am not to the point where I could say that if it snowed I wouldn't be sad (because my dress cannot be in the snow - after 200+ hours I just couldn't ruin it like that). Because I would be sad. I'm not to the point where I could just say "forget the pictures, the decorations, etc." because those aspects ARE important to me as part of my wedding experience. BUT I am becoming more aware of the sweet ceremony that will take place for Taylor and me along with our close family and friends and what it truly means to me.
I get to marry, make covenants with, be sealed to my best friend - to the sweet boy I met 7.5 years ago in the halls of Orem High School. To the person who has been through literally every emotion with me - who has supported me and loved me in all my flaws. The one who I get to wake up to every morning. The one I truly cannot live without. My infinite lover and friend.
I'm so blessed to have such an open and honest relationship with Taylor that he has been able to voice his concern about how my focus tends to slip to the more secular/career oriented side of the wedding as opposed to the important part of the wedding - the sealing. OBVIOUSLY that is the most important part and I do agree with that 100000000%, it has just been hard since my passion for weddings is also great. It is ultimately what I want my career to be in and it has been a learning process - something I didn't foresee, I didn't realize that my desire and love for planning my own wedding would get in the way of the miracle that will be taking place that day. The miracle of eternal family, of coming one step closer to exultation, of becoming Mr. and Mrs. Wilkins.
I am so extremely grateful that I was able to become aware of this before my marriage class today because this is exactly what we talked about. I am so grateful for Taylor in preparing my heart to be softened and to change my perspective now so that I can enjoy my wedding day for the right reasons. Yes, I will still love and stress about the reception, pictures, decorations, and flowers. I am still extremely excited to see all my plans come to life. BUT I am more aware of my actions/thoughts/desires which makes me even more excited for my wedding day - for the sealing, for the real reason there even is a celebration to plan.
Here is the amazing article that was referenced in my class today - with some AMAZING quotes.
Marriage in the Lord's Way, Elder Cree-L Kofford.
"You’ll love it in the temple—it’s like no other place you have ever
been. Just think, you have been invited into the Lord’s house—His house
upon the earth! His house of prayer, His house of fasting, His house of
faith, His house of learning, His house of glory, His house of
order—yes, the house of God."
"Once in a while, I’ll talk to a young Latter-day Saint couple who think
it’s more important to “walk down the aisle” or “have a big wedding” or
be surrounded by human symbols of beauty—my heart aches for them. They
simply do not understand.
You cannot improve on the Lord’s way. It was
planned by Him. The ordinance is His. The authority is His. The words
are His, and the house is His.
Who would dare to compare the tinsel of
the temporal with the gold of God? I commend you for understanding the
difference."
"Often we cheat ourselves out of the greatest spiritual experiences of our lifetime by being too wrapped up in temporal things."
"Remember that your wedding day is not a social experience with a tinge of the spiritual, but rather a spiritual experience with a tinge of the social.”
So, thank you Taylor, Elder Kofford, Dr. Larry Nelson (my professor), and my Heavenly Father for the embarrassing wake up call that I needed. Don't get me wrong - the sealing was always the most important underlying principle. It was always what I looked forward to. Each night when I have to leave Taylor I think about how excited I am to marry him - to be sealed to my sweetheart and make the sacred ordinance with him... YET I do believe at times I let the "tinsel of the temporal" stress me out too much, and get in the way of the "gold of God."
The Manti Utah Temple - Where Taylor and I will become One in 72 days.
